Most people don’t know that I’ve survived blizzards, alien oceans, cannibal islands, and haunted tunnels — all without leaving the couch. My idea of adventure usually involves a save file, a thermos of coffee, and a strong Wi-Fi connection. Real-life survival? No thanks. I’ll stick to respawnable chaos and digital wolves.

(Plenty more virtual survival stories waiting to be told over at Survivor Incognito.)

Honestly? Rested and unproductive — it’s a two-for-one deal. Some days I need to recharge, and other days I just stare at the screen pretending to plan my next move in whatever survival game I’m currently obsessed with. The trick is accepting that even survivors need downtime. After all, you can’t outrun wolves, mutants, or hunger if you’re running on empty.

(Plenty of productive procrastination happening over at Survivor Incognito.)

Anyone who’s managed to survive a week in The Long Dark without falling through the ice, accidentally eating raw meat, or setting their only pair of socks on fire. Success isn’t yachts or millions — it’s persistence, problem-solving, and remembering to save your coffee for emergencies.

(Plenty of practical, caffeine-fuelled success stories at Survivor Incognito.)

Someone who doesn’t raid your supply cache, lure predators to your cabin, or build a base two feet from your fishing hut. In the real world, I’ll settle for someone who says hi, respects quiet hours, and doesn’t set off fireworks at 2 a.m. Basically, the opposite of every NPC I’ve ever met in a survival game.

(Plenty more tips for surviving neighbours — human and otherwise — at Survivor Incognito.)

Probably resting before a new survival run instead of diving in half-prepared with three sips of coffee and misplaced confidence. Or maybe trying permadeath in something not designed to punish me for breathing wrong. Then again, chaos and curiosity tend to win… so let’s be honest, I’ll probably just try another custom mode instead.

(Plenty of first-time chaos — and second attempts — over at Survivor Incognito.)

Adapt, endure, and laugh through the chaos. Whether it’s a snowstorm in The Long Dark or life deciding to throw curveballs, I’ve learned to keep moving, keep learning, and never take the disasters too seriously. Survival — in games or reality — isn’t about perfection. It’s about persistence… and maybe having a spare cup of coffee ready.

(Plenty more survival principles — and caffeine-fuelled persistence — at Survivor Incognito.)

Editing and scheduling the next few blog entries — because somehow I treat my backlog like a survival game boss fight. I tell myself, “I’ll tackle it tomorrow,” then get distracted by another game where I’m freezing, starving, or both. Procrastination is just my brain’s version of looting one more cabin before heading home.

(Plenty more creative procrastination at Survivor Incognito.)

Probably the first time I realised no one else was going to refill the lantern fuel or pay for the med supplies. Adulthood hits differently when you’re managing both real-life bills and in-game dehydration. I still don’t always feel like a grown-up — just a survivor juggling chores and chaos with questionable lighting.

(Plenty more responsible chaos at Survivor Incognito.)

Launching a full survival gaming channel — blog, videos, maybe even merch that says ‘I fell through the ice and all I got was this T-shirt’. I’d dive head-first into every project without worrying about algorithms, time, or whether the wolves of The Long Dark are judging my aim. Failure’s part of the fun, but I’ll admit — a guaranteed win sounds tempting.

(Until that guarantee shows up, you’ll find me failing gloriously at Survivor Incognito.)

Sticking to permadeath runs. It sounds small, but in survival games it’s brutal — one mistake and everything’s gone. It takes patience, focus, and a sense of humour to watch hours of progress vanish to a wolf or a bad decision. But that’s what makes it rewarding: every survivor earns their ending, good or bad.

(Plenty more doomed goals and determined runs at Survivor Incognito.)